Thursday, February 16, 2012

Valentine's Day the Rantwick Way

Mrs. Rantwick and I believe that Valentine's Day is pure commercial nonsense. For years now, we have agreed to do nothing on Feb 14. I do, on occasion, surprise her by having flowers sent to her office or something, but never on Valentine's. We usually get some candies and stuff for the kids, but that's it.

I had been away from home (in Winnipeg, Manitoba) for over a week and was missing my family like crazy. By the way, I attempted to collect video votes for trees at the airport a couple of times, but it would seem travellers are a rather surly and suspicious bunch, and so I got nothing. I hope to have a winner before you all hate me, but no promises. Anyway, I returned home on Valentine's day. Mrs. Rantwick and the two little Rantwicks were at work and school, but they had left a lovely handmade Valentine for me!

Pretty sweet, right? Well just wait, it gets much better. Don't all the best things in life come with a disclaimer? Oh, I think so:

WARNING: We could not think of anything other than toilet humor so don't take this poem personally!

Then they hit me with a verse I shall cherish always (sniff)...

Roses are red, violets are blue
You smell funny
Just like my poo!

This came from the bottom of our HEARTS!

God I love my family. That card was LOVE with a capital P baby! Please don't be too envious of me and my awesome wife and children... although I don't know how on earth you could help it.

Yer Pal,

PS - I now realize that "LOVE with a capital P" is a rather strange thing to write. In my addled brain, the "P" was for Poo.


cafiend said...

No doubt you are frequently flushed with joy.

Unknown said...


John said...

This brought a tear to my eye... =)

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