Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me #10

Well, I've been watching TV commercials and getting annoyed again. This time it is a brand that many cyclists (especially the tech gear lovers) know well, Garmin. Here's the commercial:

OK, so where to start. First, the small, personal annoyance: Why does it appear to be effective marketing to paint spouses (wives in particular) as annoying shrews with these "honey-do" lists?

Hey, don't blame me. It's Garmin's commercial.

Even the phrase "honey-do" pisses me off. People seem to like a homonym for something like honeydew, I guess, but that's no excuse. We all have shit to do, for our families, our friends, ourselves and sometimes even, god forbid, for our spouses! WTF is wrong with that? I'll bet you a gazillion dollars that men who feel hard done by because they have chores or errands to do are also pampered little assholes who married clones of their fawning mothers rather than somebody they could respect for doing a hell of a lot more than pulling their own weight, as most wives and Moms I know do. Grrrr. Honey-do. Bah. Urg.

Now, let's turn to the more obvious problem with this commercial. To quote the commercial:

It's an insane amount of stuff, so you can do the one thing you're supposed to do: Drive.

Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me? How does an "insane amount of stuff" help you concentrate on driving? Is putting all the distractions of your phone on your dash so you can see them occurring much less distracting? I don't think so, and neither does the cartoon man in the commercial. Where is he looking as he travels along being annoyed by his wife? At his Garmin! Look!

And then he's

Then, at the end when he's supposed to be "doing the one thing you're supposed to do: Drive", he's still not right...

Sorry, cartoon man, but I need to re-arrange your face!

I lacked the skills to turn his head, but you get my drift.

Now as an added and completely unrelated bonus, I took this picture of my TV a good while ago:

All I inferred from this commercial is that people who rush in to Honda sales events are so stupid they don't know how to carry a pizza. So sad.


Thanks for reading! Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

The King of Autumn - 2016

Well, I didn't get around to taking a picture of the King this year until he was starting to go bald, but for what's it's worth, here he is:

For those of you who aren't familiar, I dubbed this tree the King of Autumn years ago. He was the starting point of an annual foliage contest, the Rantwick Autumn Tree Smackdown! That contest is currently on hiatus lazicus (look it up in the rantwick-to-latin dictionary) and may well see a revival in 2017, but obviously I'm to late too do it this year.

Anyway, it was a weird year because many leaves were falling away while the lower boughs were still green. At least the King didn't look like these jokers in the same park...

I mean, what was going on with these weirdos I wonder? When I retrieved this photo from my phone, it reminded me that I had a something else I wanted to write up about that little photo stop. Since it is really just some trivial ramblings, I have just now decided that they MUST be included in this post! 

Just past the right edge of this picture sat the Rantwick family car containing Mrs. and Daughter Rantwick, who were patiently waiting for me. Just past the left edge of this picture were a couple of young girls doing cartwheels and saumersalts and stuff. Like this:

When I got back to the car my wife and daughter said they were glad I hadn't lingered around or taken too many pictures. You know why? They said a middle aged guy on his own taking pictures in a park anywhere near children was creepy. I don't know what made me more sad, the fact that anyone would think that about a simple tree nut like me or the fact that I saw their point. We live in a fearful and cynical time; I can't claim to know where reasonable caution ends and paranoia begins, but it seems to me that most of us are more afraid than we need to be. Then again, tell that to a victim of somebody awful. Urg. Have I got you completely bummed out yet? I've brought myself down pretty good, gotta say.

On the brighter side, I got to draw thisand this for this blog post, which was fun. As easy as it is to search up an image of whatever you want these days, I still take great pleasure in making things like this from scratch. Anyway, that's it for now and I hope to be posting again soon. Thanks so much for stopping and reading this!

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

Catching Up

July 18? That can't be the last time I posted here! Holy crap, man! I mean, like, I stopped posting for a while and Donald Fucking Trump got elected President of the United States of America. W T F. PREVIOUSLY POSTED POLITICAL RANT REDACTED.

When I originally posted this I was a little more judgy and ranty than usual. There's plenty of bad vibe political stuff out there and I really don't need to be piling on like that, so sorry. More than ever, I think I need to revert to my usual cycle joy joy ways. Also, I will try to remember that a few beers go a lot further than they used to with me these days, if you catch my drift.

Speaking of things we don't speak of, however, I had a stroke about eight months ago that I swore I wouldn't mention again. I remain committed to not making this blog about stroke, but as many of my readers may have figured at the time, I won't be able to talk about myself (the single most important human ever) without talking about stroke. Mine was a hemorrhagic, not ischemic, which makes me a stroke weirdo, really. Anything I have to say doesn't apply to most stroke victims.

When I went into rehab, my singlemost important goal was riding again. I'm doing it on a regular basis now and have been since mid summer, but it drains me in a way it never did before. That said, I still love it and continue to ride as much as I can, usually to work and back on my new super duper bike of sick obsessive buildy love.

I've got some overdue pics of The King and some video I hope to post soon, but for now I hope it is enough that I've touched base. If you're reading this, I Love  You. If you're reading this and have read this blog before, I Love You Even More. 

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

A Canadian Bike Commute: Courtesy Gone Wild!!!

I'm not gonna write much for this, since the video does it all. You will notice in watching it that I am much like a small child who repeats something they find funny way too many times. But this is my blog, so tough! I tell that one way too often too! Hah!

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

The One True Bike - Part 5 - Finished!

You know how I was documenting the building of my latest bike in awful mind-numbing detail? Screw that, the bike is done! I mean, who wants to waste their time reading that shit let alone writing it? Even unrepentant cycle freaks really just want to see the bike and the selected gear. So here we go!

As I've written previously, this bike is an attempt to put all the features I've loved on other bikes into my perfect 2 wheeled machine, the One True Bike.

Now that it is finished, I can honestly say I wouldn't change a thing on this bike. I love it. Period. It rides beautifully, in just the way I had hoped. Wait; I would (will) add a Brooks saddle, probably a Cambium. And a front rack. I'm out of cash for now.

I loved the solid feel and big tires of my heavy Cube city bike. This bike weighs in at 13.6 kg (30 lbs) including accessories, where the Cube was 16 kg. This bike feels super solid although its frame and some other bits are lighter, largely thanks to wide, 40-spoke Sun Rhyno Lites with 38c Schwalbe Marathon Plus (puncture resistant) tires. I got the wheels from a place called VeloMine in the US. Good prices on what appear to be pretty good wheels. In my case they had no-name alloy hubs with cartridge bearings. I know many bike freaks out there swear by cup n' cone hubs for serviceability reasons, but I'm not good to my bikes like that and I prefer cartridge bearings. Anyway, these wheels should be great for handling my considerable weight plus the loads I plan to carry for camping and stuff.

My gearing choices were informed by how much I like simplicity and how much I dislike grip shifters. The 8 speed Nexus on my Cube was OK, but I didn't like the mystery of it all... I'm not mechanically inclined enough to delve into the guts of an IGH. My fixed gear was wonderfully simple of course, but gears are sometimes nice, particularly when carrying loads. I ended up going for a simple and solid 1X10 setup using Shimano Zee MTB/DH components. My highest gear is 36X11, which with my wheels and cranks gives me 89.4 gear inches. I won't achieve high speeds on this bike, but that was never the point. My low end is 36X36, 27.3 gear inches, which should get me over most hills, even loaded, in my non-mountainous part of the country. The Zee crankset uses the Shimano Hollowtech II system, which I like better than anything else I've ever tried.

I like racks and fenders. I will probably add a front rack soon. For now though, the Axiom Journey rear rack and SKS Chromoplastics are both items I've been really pleased with in the past.

Last, I have become tired of trying to stand my bike up, particularly with a loaded pannier or panniers, so I got a two-legged kickstand and I really like it. It is rather heavy, but weight was not a big consideration with this bike. Both legs tuck up under the left chainstay, which I thought pretty cool.

The rest of the bits and pieces were chosen based on price, aesthetics and availability, or previous experience (like the best mirror I have found). Now, to pics and specs and costs! Oh Boy!

Now, to the money spent. I've included all the boring bits like cable hangers and such because when you are a guy like me building up from bare frame at home rather than in a shop, they really add up and must be considered as part of total costs. Speaking of total costs, here they are, taxes and shipping included. Prices are in CAD. Most components came from UK online retailers, some came from Amazon.ca and the wheels from VeloMine in the USA:


Basic Elements:

Trek 20" FX Alpha Black Aluminum frame (used)         50
Deda Carbon Cross Fork                                           171
Hope Pick N'  Mix headset + star nut and cap             102
Deda Elementi Zero1 Road Stem                                32
Bontrager Big Earl Handlebar (used spare)                    0
Ritchey Logic 2 Bolt Seatpost                                      25
MEC Classic Saddle                                                    22
Shimano M530 SPD Trail Clipless MTB Pedals               38
Ergon GP1 Grips Black, Large, Standard                      38

Wheels:

Sun Rhyno Lite 40 spoke 29er wheelset rim brake       280
Schwalbe Marathon Plus Black, 700c, 38c X2               76
Vee Rubber Road Tube 700c, 38c, Presta X2                7
Velox Rim Tape Cloth White, 19mm X2                        7



Drivetrain:

SRAM PC1031 10 Speed Chain Silver                          28
Shimano Deore HG50 10 Spd MTB Cassette 11-36t      38
Shimano Zee M640 10 Speed Crankset,36t, 170mm    135
Shimano Zee M640 Shadow+ 10 Speed Derailleur       50
Shimano Zee M640 1x10sp Trigger Shifter                  32
Shimano Road Gear PTFE Cableset High Tech Grey      28


Braking:

Shimano MTB Brake PTFE Cableset High Tech Grey      28
Tektro CR720 Cyclo Cross Cantis (Front and Rear)       48
Shimano Ultegra R780 Flat Bar Brake Levers               41
Tektro Seat Clamp Cable Hanger                                14
Tektro Cable Hanger - Fork Mount                              12


Accessories:

RockBros Classical Stainless Bell (Black)                     24
SKS 50mm 700c Chromoplastic Fenders                     42
Foldable Double Leg Kickstand                                   27
Axiom Journey Rear Rack                                          56
Mirrycle Mountain Mirror Handlebar Mount                  19


Misc:

Taxes and Duties charged separately                       150


                                           all-in GRAND TOTAL    1620 CAD
                                                                            1242 USD  

It pains me a little to actually account for every little thing and see how it all adds up. Honesty with oneself is important, though, I think. In addition, I've now got a what I consider a truly kickass bike that suits me in every damn way I can think of. What's that worth?                                               

I know I have mentioned many brand names and retailers in this post. Please know I have received nothing from anyone for writing any of this.

Last but not least, some vanity shots:

Good grief am I loving this thing. I'm so lucky!
Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

PS - I started this post saying nobody needs all that tedious detail, and then proceeded to provide tons of it. Hmph. Hopefully you just skipped to the pitchers.

The One True Bike - Part 4 - Headset

As always with one of these installments, I must begin with a warning. The following is overly detailed bike crap of interest only to the mentally disturbed and me, not that those are mutually exclusive. Continue at your own risk.

I have a real thing for super-smooth and some would say over-priced headsets. My fixed gear had a Cane Creek "Solos" headset (how fitting, yes?) that was superb - the bars were almost too floppy, they turned so effortlessly, without a shred of play when doing the front-brake-on test*. Cane Creek doesn't make the Solos any more and appear to have replaced it with their 100 series.

Headset shopping is a terrible opportunity to up-sell yourself. I confess to falling victim to this again this time, but I take some solace in knowing that I didn't succumb to the "Chris King headset bling" effect. As with the Solos, I opted for something that was supposed to be competitive at a lower if still too high price point from Hope, a well respected UK brand. The thing that sealed the deal for me was that the Hope headsets were offered in what they called "Pick n' Mix" formats: You could buy the top and bottom headset parts separately, which allowed me to be confident I was getting the correct bits for fitting my straight 1-1/8" steer tube into the frame's tapered (different diameter top and bottom) head tube. Here's what I bought:

The star nut and top cap pictured were not included with the headset - had to buy it separately. The cost of all pictured was 101.97 CAD all-in, shipping included. Thus far I have eluded paying tax or duty on my purchases from the UK. I get free shipping for orders over $99 CAD, so I've been keeping the orders value as close to that as possible in the hopes that a lower $ value makes them of less interest to customs. In addition, Chain Reaction has a "regular mail" option which is less likely to get automatic attention at the border. These things combined have helped me so far, I think, though shipping is slower and I can't track the package. Anyway, my family members were mortified that these little things cost a hundred bucks. I guess they would have really freaked had I bought a $200 King!

First, I just took my new parts and dry-fit them to the fork and frame to make sure I hadn't messed up. I had not. Yay!!! Next, I decided to try to be more responsible and figure out how to press the cups rather than whack 'em into place with a piece of wood and a hammer like the last time I did this. I used a couple of videos by RJ The Bike Guy to guide me in making and using a headset tool.

Headset tool https://youtu.be/HGfvO-ztoT4 

Doing the install https://youtu.be/yAXFyfBJhKU 

I don't see much use in making videos of myself doing stuff I learned from other videos. Things went about the same as they did for RJ, and now I have a bike frame and fork that are attached to each other!

The stem in the picture is a flashy silver Race Face Deus XC that I bought years ago on Ebay for my fixed gear build. I ended up using the exact same stem, but shorter. At 130mm it may well be too long for this build, but I hope not because love how it looks and I don't see silver ones like this around as much now. We shall see, I suppose. As you can see, the fork is still uncut and will remain so until I can play around with bike fit, figure out how high the seat will be, etc. Only then will I make that fateful cut, insert the necessary spacers and install the star nut and cap.

I know I have mentioned brand names and retailers in this post. Please know I have received nothing from anyone for writing any of this.

That's it for this part, except the cost tally:

Used Frame                                            50.00
Headset cup removal tool                         fear (0.00)
Deda Cross Fork                                      171.00
Hope headset + star nut and cap              102.00
Home-made headset press                         20.00
Stem                                                      spare, so "Free"

TOTAL                                                    343.00

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

* A properly installed/adjusted headset will allow the bars to turn smoothly and easily, and have no "play" when the front brake is applied while attempting to rock the rock the bike forward and backward.