Monday, April 20, 2009

Encounters with Rantwick, episode two: Inspector Goose's extreme pie plate vigilance

If you don't read bikesnobNYC like I do, the title of this post won't make any sense. The short version is that the snob hates pie plates, but it's geese who have been doing something about it.

Pie plates are those plastic or metal discs that come on many bicycles, and are also called spoke protectors.

They supposedly guard your spokes against chain damage if it ends up way up there. The truth, however, is that any properly tuned bicycle would never need one thanks to the limiting screws on any modern derailleur.

I commute on a fixed gear bicycle (one gear only, no coasting, no derailleur), so in my case a pie plate would be extra super duper useless. Perhaps this was why I was subjected to my harrowing meeting with Inspector Goose:

Those three quick steps still cause me to shudder with fear when I see them. Most of you have pie plates on your bicycles. I have no personal interest in your removing them, but beware Inspector Goose, man, beware Inspector Goose.

Spring is Here! Ride that bike and I'll see you next Monday.



trafgod man said...

Well I just witnessed the Goose Vigilance episode. Holy Crap, I'm heading to the Rhombus to figure things out. This episode has caused as forshadowing of the obsurd.

Thank you
A respected listener

Fanky Fank said...

You are one weird dude. I have no idea what you are on about here.

RANTWICK said...

Yeah, well... some things are difficult to convey without seeming weird.

On a happy note, I have encountered inspector goose several times since that day, and he has allowed me to pass without threatening me further.

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