The Other Other Other Woman

When cycle blog reading people see a title like "The Other Woman" they naturally make the assumption that "she" is yet another bike. Car enthusiasts use the expression all the time for their secondary passions too. Indeed, I have posted on three bikes in just such a manner in the past. In this case, however, "The Other Woman" actually refers to a woman. I love her. It's a good thing Mrs. Rantwick is OK with my fixations on unreal women like Mother Nature and my new flame, Billboard Bike Woman:

She speaks to me every time I ride by, whispering sweet bike path nothings filled with the promise of freewheeling sun-dappled romance and a nice red wine buzz. She is a stylized, unreal swoopy-figured lady purposefully crafted to drive me mad. She is the natural advertising result of the current popularity of cycle chic, transportation cycling and many people's deep love of red wine; in the immortal words of Meatloaf (the only true authority on love), two out three ain't bad, baby. Cycle Chic isn't really my thing... although maybe I'll make an exception in her case.

my latest devastating crush

Now, contrary to the abundant evidence otherwise, I ain't stupid. I can see through this billboard lady's wine and dress and bike and basket. I know that she is really just another famous woman, repackaged for the gentle cycling wino set:

I don't care. In fact, her less refined and more lurid past in the mud flap trade just makes her even more attractive to me. I mean, everyone has a past, right? Who am I to judge?

Yer Pal,

 

R A N T W I C K

SARATS Entry #4

Cafiend of Citizen Rider has sent me his SARATS entry. His email:

Imagine this one with all its leaves and better lighting. I never seem to catch it at its best when I have the camera and time to stop.

Cafiend, my man, of course I can relate. Missing the King at his best started this whole contest thing! Thanks very much for your entry... I can see how that tree could be a killer. I also think it has been a pretty tough year for catching a tree at its best for many of us. Into the contest it goes!

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K

Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me #6

This installment of "Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me" made me feel that way three times over. Here's how it went.

I saw a commercial on TV recently that I really liked:

I liked it because I thought, "Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me? That guy just said "Yes, the money's expensive, but there's no collateral""!  That kind of candor isn't something you normally ever see in a commercial. Cool.

When I went on youtube to find it, the comments made me want to throw up. There were a bunch of stupid racist comments about Native people. I know I shouldn't have been surprised... comments sections on big sites like youtube seem to bring out all the worst and dimmest rather than the best and brightest. Just the same, Are You #%^1n' Kiddin' Me? In 2011? Really?

I was, of course, intrigued by this straight-shooting lender. That dude said right out that the money was expensive. How expensive? I went to their website to find out:

pic source

I'm not gonna say it a third time. I will also leave you to do some of the math. I agree with the guy in the commercial. Keep the costs down by paying it off as fast as you can. Like, really really fast. Really.

Yer Pal,

R A N T W I C K